Slap Shot
WOMAN ON TV: (SINGING)
Indian Spring Water
MALE ANNOUNCER:
Pure spring water brought
right to your door.
The taste you remember
from childhood.
Indian Spring Water
Call your local
Indian Spring man.
He’s in the Yellow Pages.
It’s only a few pennies a day.
WOMAN: Enjoy the winter
clearance sale at Howlands.
All prices
drastically slashed.
(WATER RUNNING)
50 percent off
on ladies’ parkas.
Come on and see it.
53 Market Street at the sign
of the winking owl.
WBROL, Charlestown.
ANNOUNCER:
Channel 8’s 11:00 movie,
Richard Anthony
in High Risk Devils.
And now back to
Jim Carr’s Sports Talk.
Hi, Jim Carr again.
Denis, I know that some
in our audience don’t know
the finer points of hockey.
Could you tell them,
for example, what is icing?
Icing happen
when the puck come down,
bang, you know,
before the other guys,
nobody there.
My arm go comes up,
then the game stop,
then start up.
I see.
What is high-sticking?
High-sticking happen
when the guy take the stick,
and he go like that.
You don’t do that.
You don’t do that?
Oh, no, never, never.
Why not?
Against the rules.
You know, you’re stupid
when you do that.
Just some English pig
with no brains, you know.
What is slashing?
Slashing is like that,
you know.
(GROANS)
And…there’s
a penalty for that?
Yeah. And for trip also,
you know, like that.
And for hook like this.
And for spear like that.
All bad.
You do that,
you go to the box, you know.
Two minutes by yourself,
and you feel shame, you know.
And then you get free.
The Chiefs are at home tonight
against Hyannisport
at the War Memorial at 8:00.
Good seats
are still available.
ANNOUNCER: A look at sports.
I think that went well.
(CROWD CHEERING)
P.A. ANNOUNCER:
At defense for the Chiefs,
number 5, Billy Charlebois!
At center for the Chiefs,
number 7, player-coach
Reggie Dunlop!
Dunlop, you stink!
At left wing,
number 10, Ned Braden!
I hate you, Braden!
Playing right wing,
number 14, Jean-Guy Drouin!
Frog pussy!
Ladies and gentlemen,
our national anthem.
(THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER
PLAYING)
Go get them, kid.
Hey, Denis!
(PLAYERS CHATTERING)
How’s it going, Nick?
I’m drunk.
Nah!
I’m not bullshitting ya.
Got shitfaced on the bus.
Louise left me,
and that son of a bitch
keeps playing me
when he knows I’m shitfaced.
Geez, I’m really sorry.
Anybody throws me
against the boards, I’m gonna
piss all over myself.
Take it down
to the other end, Ned.
(PLAYERS SHOUTING)
(BUZZER BUZZING)
I thought I’d get Jerry
one of those “Great Ideas
of the World” sets.
You can look up the ideas
alphabetically: arts,
mechanics, philosophy.
Yeah. Johnny always says
you can just screw so much
and drink so much.
He’s screening me!
Move him out!
(BUZZER BUZZING)
We got Charlestown
trailing three to nothing
with 10:48 left
in the first period.
Oops! Correction, folks,
that’s two to nothing.
We don’t want to make it
any tougher for the Chiefs
than it already is.
(PLAYERS SHOUTING)
(CROWD CHEERING)
(BUZZER BUZZING)
That’s what
you’re paid for, Braden!
Try winning a game
for a change.
Nice going, kid.
ANNOUNCER: Number 10,
Braden, with his 18th goal
of the year.
Assisted by number 7, Dunlop,
and number 14, Drouin.
Ned Braden is now
the leading scorer
in the Federal League.
Tie it up out there, guys!
Come on, defense.
Get the puck outta here!
DENIS: Hit him, Billy,
hit him!
(BUZZER BUZZING)
(SHOUTING)
With us in the press box
is injured Chiefs’ defenseman
Dave Carlson.
Dave, is it tough
sitting up here watching
your team lose like this?
Definitely, Jim.
You injured your knee
in the Peterboro game.
No.
No? I thought you had.
No, I have a cold.
The runny nose,
sore throat, all that.
I went out in that storm
last week to start my car.
I didn’t have my jacket on.
It may have settled
in my kidneys.
We got action here.
Hit him with your purse,
ya pussy!
Jesus, look at Brophy.
He’s plastered!
He told me so!
If anybody boards him,
he’s gonna piss
all over himself.
Piss all over himself.
Faire “pipi,” eh?
No, no, I okay.
Clear the puck, Billy!
Get this guy outta my crease!
(CROWD CHEERING)
(PHONE RINGING)
(ANNOUNCER CHATTERING)
Joe McGrath. Oh, yes, miss!
Get off the ice, Nick.
You’re gonna
kill yourself.
(CROWD CHEERING)
They’re on the ice right now
giving their all.
They will be ready.
WOMAN: Ensemble number 32,
entitled “Omar Sharif”
and modeled by
Chiefs’ defenseman
Billy Charlebois
who hails from,
if I can read the card,
Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan.
Notice the padded shoulders,
giving the ’40s look.
You look nice,
real spiffy.
Keep in mind
that the perfect accessory
for the man in your life
is a season ticket
to the Chiefs games.
I look like some
cocksucking faggot!
You seen Reg or Braden?
Joe, enough’s enough.
Nowhere in my contract
does it say I gotta make
a fool outta myself.
Have you seen
Dunlop or Braden?
I’m gonna flash them, Joe.
I’m gonna walk down
that aisle,
open this bathrobe
and wiggle my dick at them.
You will not.
Yes, I am, Joe.
You know why?
Because I want you to have
a heart attack and die
so we never have to
do this again.
You and your
fucking fashion show!
It’s good publicity.
You fellas have not been
drawing them in the way
you have in the past.
I’m gonna wiggle it at them,
you cheap bastard.
You better be prepared
’cause when I yank it out,
everybody in that audience,
with the exception of my wife,
is gonna be running
for the exits.
WOMAN: Ensemble number 8
as we watch
Chiefs’ defenseman
Johnny Upton…
Joe McGrath here.
Just checking on Dunlop…
(WOMEN CHEERING)
We have two generations
of pro hockey with us
for you folks to call in
and question.
Player-coach Reggie Dunlop
and right wing Ned Braden.
Reggie, you represent
the old guard,
one of the iron men
of the Federal League.
You’ve been playing pro hockey
for how many years?
Quite a few, Jim.
Is that right?
And on the other side
of the scale, Ned Braden
who’s a college graduate,
and an American citizen!
You went to Princeton
and were All-Eastern.
That’s what it said
in the yearbook, Jim.
Okay.
Our lines are open.
Anything you folks wanna know
about the fascinating world
of pro hockey, here we go!
Hi, there. Jim Carr.
What’s your question?
WOMAN ON PHONE: Dunlop,
you old fart, why don’t you
get outta the game and let…
We… We’re gonna spin
some music while we’re waiting
for our next caller.
BRADEN: Jim, I know
a lot of kids would enjoy
coming to the games
to see a great veteran
like Reggie Dunlop skate.
While we’re waiting
for our next caller,
we’d like to remind
you folks calling in
to keep your questions
within the boundaries
of good taste.
What kind of broad is it
who calls up and says
something like that?
They’re supposed
to be our fans.
Just ’cause we’re losing…
Who cares? It’s over.
Idiot McGrath
and his shitty P.R. schemes.
I hate that cheap bastard.
(SIREN HOOTING)
What are these
poor fuckers gonna do
when they close the mill?
They ain’t
closing the mill!
They’re just jacking
the guys around so they’ll
feel happy they got jobs.
It’s the old tactic,
the mind-fuck.
Announced it this morning.
April 1, they shut it tight.
Yeah?
Yeah!
That’s a big surprise.
Ten thousand mill workers
have been placed on waivers.
What the hell are they
gonna do with them?
I don’t know.
Every sucker for himself.
(HORN HONKING)
Hey, who’s she?
Slipped my mind.
Oh, yeah? Maybe
your wife’ll remember her.
(MUSIC PLAYING ON CAR STEREO)
BRADEN: You’re the best girl
in the whole world.
Yes, you are.
Ruby! How’s my Ruby?
How’s my girl, huh?
You’re a sweetheart.
I missed you.
You’re a sweetheart.
Are you my girl?
Beginning to like it
here, huh?
No, I hate it here!
I’m cracking up.
You know what I mean?
You don’t look bad.
I can’t figure it out.
I’m slipping fast.
I think you look fine.
BRADEN: Slow down.
You’re making her nervous.
Jerry, I’d like
to cancel the order.
REGGIE: Joe?
And there’s another matter
that’s come up
and is kinda important…
Would you hold it a minute?
Joe, what happens to us
when the mill closes?
Don’t worry about it.
The new boys are coming in
on the 4:15 bus.
I wanna know
what happens…
Who are these guys?
I never even heard of them.
Son, just pick them up
and take them over
to the hotel.
I’ve done enough shit work.
The fucking fans
are calling in
with dirty talk.
Nothing in my contract
says I gotta…
Do you see this quarter?
It used to be a nickel.
Now, the golden years
are behind you.
One season, maybe two,
you’ll be hanging up
the blades
and retiring the ax.
Fuck it.
Then you’ll remember
it was Joe McGrath
who trained you
for the front office.
I’m sorry, Jerry.
Like I say, I’d like to
cancel the order.
In fact, I’ve got
some equipment
I’d like to sell.
Skate sharpener,
massage table,
jacuzzi, our bus.
(CROWD CHATTERING)
P.A. ANNOUNCER:
Transways Express Flyer,
number 83 for Pittsburgh,
Cleveland…
(LOUD BANGING)
Hey! Hey!
Hey! You guys the Hanson’s?
Fucking machine
took my quarter.
Who are you?
Reggie Dunlop, the coach.
Grab your frigging gear
and let’s get going.
Okay. C’mon, Steve.
Let’s go.
Took my quarter!
You think they show
Speed Racer here?
Hey, guys!
Hey! Wait up. Hold up.
Look what I got!
You guys triplets
or something?
No, I’m in the middle.
Steve’s 20, Jeff’s 18.
Where are you from?
Iron League.
The Iron League, huh?
Lotta fights?
Nah.
Hey, I want a soda!
We paid for you here
for a week, then you gotta
find a room of your own.
Okay, coach. Gimme a grape
or an orange.
None of that root beer!
We go on the road tomorrow…
We’re on the road
in the morning.
JACK: I don’t want any…
The bus leaves
the War Memorial
at 8:00 A.M.
JACK: I gave you a quarter
at the bus station.
JEFF: Well, will you give me
another dime?
I’m saving the dime
to call Mom.
Jesus Christ.
You cheap son of a bitch!
Are you crazy?
Those guys are retards!
I got a good deal
on those boys.
The scout said
they showed a lot of promise.
They brought
their fucking toys
with them!
I’d rather have them
playing with their toys
than playing with themselves.
They’re too dumb
to play with themselves!
Every piece of garbage
that comes on the market,
you gotta buy it!
Reg, that reminds me.
I was coaching
in Omaha in 1948,
and Eddie Shore
sends me this guy who’s
a terrible masturbator.
Couldn’t control himself.
He would get
deliberate penalties
so he could
get into the penalty box
all by himself,
and damned if he wouldn’t,
you know.
(EXCLAIMING)
(LAUGHING)
Oh, Joe, Jesus.
What was his name?
(EXCLAIMING)
(70’S MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
Move back. There you go.
Number three.
No one can take your place
If you get hurt
If you get hurt
“To see the three Chiefs
make a scoring rush,
“the bright colors
of their jerseys
“flashing against
the milky ice was to see
a work of art in motion.”
That’s good writing, Dickie.
I was trying to capture
the spirit of the thing.
Oh, you did.
Want a beer
to go along with that?
It’s ridiculous
for us to be here.
We stick out like a couple
of sore thumbs.
I’m doing what I like.
It’s making you crazy too.
You’re turning
into a zombie.
You told me so.
I don’t wanna have
a fight again.
“Rookie goalie Denis Lemieux
“continuing his brilliant
first season
with the Chiefs…”
(BOTH SPEAKING FRENCH)
(READING IN FRENCH)
My father’d give you a job.
Your father’d give you a job.
I’m all for that.
Always good to have choices.
I just wanna get out
of this goddamn dump!
You take the van.
I’ll keep the dog.
Hey, Lily! Come on…
What’s the matter with her?
You’re bullshit!
You’re really bullshit!
You’re drunk!
You’re right,
he’s bullshit.
Yeah? Well, he and I
are the only decent items
in here.
Why should she give a shit
what other people
think of her?
She’s just scrapping!
My heart goes out to her.
You guys gotta stop losing.
Get the power play together.
We’re working on it.
Is he nice to her?
Yes. He love her!
He tell me, “I love her!”
God,
maybe Braden’s a faggot.
Ever think of that?
You crazy!
He has a big cock
like a horse!
You think
that lady in the red dress
will go home with me?
No, she’s not your type.
How much?
Five dollars she don’t
even look at your face.
Aha, ha, aha
You’ve got
a cute way of talking
You’ve got the better of me
Just snap your fingers
and I’m walking
Francine, you look terrific.
You’re right.
You’ve been had.
That’s his wife.
(DOOR OPENING)
REGGIE: So, how’s your money
holding out?
FRANCINE:
There’s a beer in the fridge
if you want one.
Is that a new dress?
Sort of.
Looks good. Kinda tight.
I think I’m gaining
a little weight.
REGGIE: I don’t know.
Maybe it’s better tight.
Maybe.
Is that the first time
you wore that dress?
Been going out?
Getting around?
Been seeing somebody
in that dress?
Making out?
That’s none of your
business anymore.
Jesus Christ, Francine.
I think about you
all the time.
Nothing is ever over.
If I wasn’t so goddamn busy,
I’d see more of you.
I was gonna come down
the other night and ask if you
wanted to go to the Aces.
But, I don’t know,
something came up.
What?
You need dough?
Save your money, Reggie.
You’re gonna need it.
Who me?
The minute
they close the mill,
the Chiefs are gonna fold.
That’s bullshit.
These people
are gonna be broke.
They’re not gonna be going
to hockey games.
And you’re not getting
any younger.
I’ve got nothing
to worry about.
I coach. I got experience.
You’re no good at it.
Every player on that team
thinks I’m the greatest.
What?
You’re a losing coach.
You can’t make them win.
Ah, geez.
I was thinking about you
the other day.
I was trying to imagine you
when you were through
with hockey, and I couldn’t.
There was nobody there.
What are you gonna do?
I’m gonna come back to you!
Too little too late.
(HORN HONKING)
MAN: Hey, Charlie!
LILY: Ned? Ned!
I underlined
the fuck scenes for ya.
Get back in the van.
You’re gonna
catch pneumonia.
(CAR ENGINE STARTING)
Go on back to the van
’cause you’re gorgeous
and you’re gonna
catch pneumonia!
Go get her, Billy.
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
Back in the old iron lung.
She underlines
the fuck scenes for ya?
She underlines
the fuck scenes,
she must worship
the ground you walk on.
They teach you how to
underline in college.
Not the fuck scenes,
they don’t.
Braden, you gotta learn
to put out more.
You know what I mean?
(MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
Holy Mother of God!
Ned, are you seeing
what I’m seeing?
Hey, Billy.
(ALL LAUGHING)
Jesus, it’s finally happened.
STEVE: Hi, guys.
How ya doing?
They’re horrible looking!
Don’t look at me.
It’s McGrath’s doing,
not mine.
What’d the old man trade
for these assholes?
A used puck bag?
I think
it’s a fucking disgrace.
Watch Braden.
He’s gonna do something.
BRADEN: Hi.
Are you guys brothers?
Are you guys brothers?
What a life!
Bets on the trip.
Walter’s entrusted me
with our E.T.A.
to Lancaster. $5 limit.
BRADEN: I’m ready
to take estimates
from the membership.
Walter’s the leading
contender…
Hey, Reg.
…for the outdoor record
Charlestown to Lancaster.
All aboard, son.
Let’s go, Walt.
Where are the new boys?
Oh, son.
There are your brothers.
Why is the fucking old man
making this trip?
I don’t know.
(ALL CHATTERING)
McGRATH: We’re expecting
great things from you boys.
BRADEN: Walt, you didn’t
tell me you were holding out
on your old bookmaker.
I’m gonna have to
give them odds!
Ooh, and it’s all right
And it’s coming on
We gotta get right back
To where we started from
Love is good, love is strong
On the stick.
Let’s go, Denis.
Two dollars.
Two bucks. I’ll call.
Fold.
Let’s see it.
Two and sixes.
That’s nice!
I’m out.
Kings over!
Fuck! I lose my blouse.
Shirt. Shirt.
Shit.
If you sign your contract
over to me,
I’ll prorate your losses.
Jesus Christ, Braden!
You would, wouldn’t you?
My ambition is to win
all your contracts.
Become the owner
of this fucking club,
run it my way.
I’d make a fortune.
Compulsory fashion shows
every afternoon.
Radiothons twice a week.
Recycled jock straps.
Who owns the club anyway?
I don’t know.
You don’t know?
What do you mean?
A corporation owns it.
Who cares?
You get your check.
That’s the spirit, Reg.
Hey, pot’s light.
BRADEN: Who’s in?
UPTON: Not for long.
What’s the game?
Same game. Jacks or better.
UPTON: With nothing wild,
right?
TV HOST: …for two
to gorgeous Honolulu!
Oh, my God!
You’ll be staying
at the all-new…
(PLAYERS CHATTERING)
Hey, Drouin,
change the channel!
(IN FRENCH)
“Changez la canal.”
Jean-Guy, leave it.
Shittiest rink
in the fucking league!
Ice is a goddamn disgrace.
You oughta put some
fucking Downy
in these jerseys.
PLAYER: Hey, guys.
Wow, we’re in trouble.
What?
Oh, shit, he’s here!
Who?
Ogilthorpe.
Oggie Ogilthorpe?
“Ogiltorp”?
Ogilthorpe.
They oughta throw
this fucking guy
in San Quentin.
He is a criminal element.
The worst goon
in hockey today.
A real cement head.
Big Afro.
Twenty-one, twenty-two.
Watch out for him.
He’s not playing.
He’s suspended.
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
That’s Oggie!
All right, guys!
(ALL CHATTERING)
Big crowd out there.
Let’s really try to win
this one, hey, boys?
Gotta hand it
to the old bastard.
He’s highly original.
That man traveled
15 hours by bus
to say that?
MAN: That felt good.
(PLAYERS CHATTERING)
What are you guys doing?
Putting on the foil!
Every game.
You want some?
No.
Jesus fucking Christ.
They don’t leave the bench.
Charlie…
McGRATH:
Come on now. The Chiefs
are a terrific organization!
But the mill is closing,
and next year
I’d be interested
in a good front-office job.
Al, that’s why
made the trip!
I wanted to talk
to you fellas
face-to-face.
Excuse me
just a minute.
Push that pelvis
way up there.
Way, way up there.
REGGIE: Let’s pay it
smart out there tonight.
I wanna see a lot of work
from you guys.
Use your heads
on the ice out there,
will ya?
Christ, we all know
how to play hockey.
Just play it smart.
Get out there
and stick them!
Fuck them.
Christ, pop them!
Let’s get our share!
Let’s go!
Come on!
Let’s go now!
We need this win.
We got a lot of losses…
Yeah, we got
a lot of them!
(HANSONS CLAMORING)
Go to the top! That’s what
we’re here for. To win!
Play heads-up out there.
Let’s be smart.
Man for man, we’re better
than any fucking club
if we just put
our minds to it.
(CLAMORING)
Come on, Braden.
Our line starts.
(ALL CHATTERING)
HANSONS:
Come on! Let’s go!
It’s fucking embarrassing.
(CROWD CHEERING)
(BUZZER BUZZING)
(ORGAN PLAYING)
Come on, guys!
We can get it back!
What for? We’re history.
What are you
talking about?
What does that mean?
McGrath’s in there trying
to get himself another job.
Fucking team’s folding.
I knew there was a reason
he made the trip.
Nobody told me anything.
The fucker was holding
onto the news until he could
scrounge another job.
Jesus Christ.
Cover his wrinkled old ass.
Fucking Chrysler Plant,
here I come.
The team, fini, kaput.
Fini?
P.A. ANNOUNCER:
Gears’ goal scored
by number 5.
Time of goal 8:04.
This is the last season.
It’ll be announced tomorrow.
(BUZZER BUZZING)
(ORGAN PLAYING)
I’m too old
to be traded again.
A one in a million chance.
I’m gonna be calling
my brother-in-law in
the fucking Chrysler plant.
Operator? Operator?
Bernard, they close it.
Yeah.
I want to echanger.
Bernard, call Detroit.
Tell them bullshit!
Yeah. Yeah, something.
No, wait a minute.
Ned, what’s echanger
in English?
Trade me right fucking now.
Trade me right fucking now!
And hang up.
(PHONE RINGING)
Hello?
Wait a minute. Reg?
Yeah?
(TV CHATTERING)
Yeah? Hey!
If I had to do it again,
I would’ve gotten
an education.
You know what I mean?
Look at Ned. He doesn’t
have to depend on hockey.
What are you doing here?
Where’s Hanrahan?
I know a good bar here.
The Palm Isle.
Fucked the barmaid
last trip.
I mean,
I walked into the place,
she comes up to me
without even saying hello,
and just rubs against me…
Come on, Mo. Jesus. What?
She had her jugs up
against my suit.
Nipples as hard
as little rocks.
Right, Morris.
Yeah. What’s the address?
Any of you guys
know the Palm Isle
in this town?
Yeah, don’t move.
TV HOST: Before Larry
has his one chance
at our jackpot bowl,
is there anyone
you’d like to say hello
to back home?
Ten bucks he says
“all the guys at work.”
Wife and kids!
Look into the camera
and say hello to anybody.
I’d like to say hi
to all the guys at work
if I can.
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
(HANSONS CHATTERING)
JACK: Put my fucking car back
on the track!
One more lap!
Hi, coach.
Hi.
(HANSONS CHATTERING)
Two nothing. Two nothing.
Brought your cars
with you, huh?
We’re on the road.
All set to go.
Tell us when.
Oh, I’m shuffling
lines around.
I’ll let you know
when I get it
straightened out.
Okay, coach.
See you later, coach.
Five nothing.
(HANSONS CHATTERING)
The thing’s not working!
I quit. I don’t wanna play
no more.
You broke the darn car.
How am I supposed to play?
(REGGIE MOANING)
You are the first man
I’ve slept with
since I left Hanrahan.
REGGIE: Oh, Suzanne,
a beautiful woman like you?
I’ve been sleeping
with women.
Are you shocked?
No.
Did you ever want
to sleep with a man?
No.
Never?
No!
I don’t blame you though.
I mean, women’s bodies
are beautiful.
But men’s bodies,
I see them everywhere.
In the locker rooms,
cocks all over the place.
Do you wanna know
how it happened?
No. That’s okay.
No, that’s all right,
’cause I have to tell it
in court anyway.
Every time Hanrahan
went out on the road,
I would go over
to this wife’s house
and we would get drunk.
We would talk about
how depressed and lonely
we were without the guys.
Every week…
Then, one night
we were talking about
how we hated the life,
and how we had
never done much
of anything ourselves.
I don’t know why, really.
We were like kids.
We started playing
with one another.
We were drunk as usual.
And the next week
we did it sober,
and it was terrific!
At the end of the day,
I think about women,
about women’s bodies.
Maybe all that will change.
Maybe I’ll wind up sleeping
with old goalies.
Things being what they are,
who knows?
When Hanrahan found out
about it, he went crazy!
He said if I was a dyke,
that made him a queer.
And he started
slapping me around.
I ended up in the hospital.
Jesus!
Yeah. I’m on the lam.
I’m hiding out.
We play him next week,
you know.
Oh, God. I got so sick
of those games.
They seem so childish.
The Chiefs are folding.
The mill’s closing
and the economy and stuff.
I just found out about it.
I don’t know
what I’m gonna do.
Christ, a handsome man
like you, Reggie?
It ain’t easy.
I don’t see myself
in one of those bullshit
9:00 to 5:00 jobs.
You could get traded.
Suzanne, I ain’t
a rookie anymore.
So far as the coaching goes,
the Chiefs are…
Hey, use your imagination.
That’s what I’ve been doing.
Look at me!
Here I am a no-good,
runaway hockey wife.
A dyke?
Yes.
(ROARING)
GIRL: Turn it off!
I hate it!
I hate it. Turn it off!
Don’t touch
that television set!
I’m sorry about
the Chiefs, Reg.
I’m doing a tribute
to the team on Sunday.
“Chiefs fold.
A sad commentary.”
Somewhat along those lines.
Dickie?
Huh?
Something’s afloat.
On the Q.T., I think
they’re gonna sell us.
It’s hush-hush
and I can’t name names,
but let’s say
that there’s
a senior citizens’ community
in the market
for a hockey team.
The Chiefs?
Actually, it’s Florida.
They’re getting a bunch
of old geezers
from the northeast.
And what do you think
those old geezers
really miss in Florida?
I think there are a lot
of shysters in Florida.
Hockey. Their own team.
A Saturday night game.
Hell, those poor old people,
they gotta have
something to root for.
BOY: You’re a pussy!
Daddy, he called me a pussy,
and then he changed
the station.
Don’t bother your daddy
now. Work it out
amongst yourselves.
So, now…let me
get this straight.
A retirement community
has bought the Chiefs.
Oh, no! No.
I said negotiating.
That’s not much to go on!
Dickie, they’ve already
built the rink!
They’ve dumped
a lot of capital into this.
What they’re really
looking for is
a cheap deal on a team.
And since we ain’t exactly
the Boston Bruins…
How could anybody
in his right mind
buy a fifth-place team?
That situation
is gonna be changed,
I guarantee you.
Come on, watch your wing!
REGGIE: Hey, Hanrahan!
Hanrahan?
Cover the point!
Goddamn it,
cover the point.
Come on, Mo!
Give it to them!
It’s along the boards.
Nail him! Nail him!
Hanrahan,
Suzanne sucks pussy!
(PLAYERS SHOUTING)
Get him the fuck
outta there, will ya?
Behind the net!
Hanrahan, she’s a dyke!
I know! I know!
(CROWD CHEERING)
Take it out!
She’s a lesbian!
Son of a bitch!
I’ll kill you!
(BUZZER BUZZING)
(ORGAN PLAYING)
(ALL CHEERING)
(GRUNTING)
You’re nuts, Hanrahan!
He wouldn’t dare pull
anything like that
on Johnny.
REFEREE: It’s all over,
it’s all over. That’s it.
That’s it, that’s all,
that’s it.
Go!
What the fuck?
He’s the fucking one
who started it.
Son of a bitch!
Jesus Christ!
Son of a bitch,
I’ll kill you!
We got one!
Good job, guys.
That’s the way!
Two points, that’s it!
(PLAYERS CHATTERING)
My allergy
to those fucking fans,
you know, has returned.
That ends the longest
fucking losing streak.
What’d he say to Hanrahan?
Two points, eh?
Hey, Reg? Reg,
what’d you say to him?
I told him his wife
was a dyke.
No!
Yeah!
Fuck.
Jesus Christ! No wonder
he flipped his lid.
Anybody who’d call
my old lady a dyke,
I’d go fucking bananas.
His wife is a dyke!
Jesus Christ.
Poor fucking guy.
Does that make him a fag?
Fuck him! Hanrahan’s an ape.
I knew it’d piss
the shit outta of him.
She’s a fantastic gal.
I mean, fantastic!
I knew it’d drive him berserk.
JACK: You nailed him, coach.
You nailed him
in the fucking head.
Nailed him in his mind.
He deserved it!
Yeah, yeah!
That was wrestling shit
out there.
They didn’t have
a backup goalie.
It was a garbage goal.
No. You gotta twist them
and fuck with them.
It was a garbage win.
(HORN HONKING)
Hey! Hey, Lily!
Lil, where’re
you going?
Hey, Lily!
Hey, Lily.
Hey!
Lil?
Jesus, Lily, there’s been
three rapes and two murders
in this park in one year.
I didn’t do it.
We’re gonna freeze.
If you leave,
you won’t have that problem.
What’s the story
on that dog?
What?
What’s the story on that dog?
That’s the dog
that saved Charlestown
from the 1938 flood.
Well, fuck him.
He’s just gonna shock her
with his views on life.
If you were to come up
to my apartment right now,
I’d fix you something hot
to drink, I’d rub your back.
Maybe we could find
a good game on TV.
Great.
I’d even fix you
something to eat.
Tell you some stories.
By the time pneumonia set in,
you’d be sound asleep.
I’ll see you around.
He’s been so kind to me.
He comes in every day.
WOMAN ON TV:
He doesn’t want to rush
your progress now.
I’ll invite him out
to the summerhouse tonight
so we can talk
about you more.
MAN ON TV: I wish I could
put my arms around you.
When you get out
of this jacket, you can.
Hi, guys.
Hi, coach.
Reg.
WOMAN: I sold your car.
MAN: My 260Z?
Yes.
But that was my car!
Alex, don’t you remember?
When you had the amnesia,
you gave me power of attorney.
I’d forgotten.
That cunt is no good.
Nice talk.
I’ve botched up
everything, haven’t I?
She do that on purpose
to make him crazy
so he don’t know
what he’s doing.
Cynthia Pierce
is having an affair
with Carl Barton.
She’s lying to him.
Oh, Alex,
you mustn’t be weak.
I don’t believe this.
I don’t frigging
believe this!
Hey, you guys, listen.
“Chiefs Sought
by Florida Retirement
Communities.”
Come on, Dave!
Listen, Johnny.
It’s right here.
J.G., Jimmy,
come over here.
Listen to this.
“Unidentified
but reliable sources have
informed the Times Herald
“that a St. Petersburg,
Florida retirement community
“is negotiating
with the Charlestown
Hockey Corporation
“for the purchase
of the Charlestown Chiefs.”
It’s right there. Look!
I don’t believe that.
Dickie Dunn wrote this.
It’s gotta be true.
That’s fantastic!
Florida!
What sucker would buy
the Chiefs?
Jealous, big guy?
Your mother should’ve
bought you skates!
(SINGING) Cut off my balls
I’ll be skating in Florida
We’re gonna miss you guys.
Here’s to the sap
that would buy the Chiefs.
Hell! Here’s to
the Sunshine State!
Here’s to all that
gorgeous snatch in F-L-A.
WOODY WOODPECKER ON TV:
Guess who?
(WOODY WOODPECKER LAUGHING)
(GROANS)
What’s wrong, Reg?
Oh, nothing.
You got an expression
of sadness on your face.
I guess this is
my last season.
No, it’s not.
We’re being bought.
You get to be my age,
you gotta think
about retiring.
I know all the other teams
laugh at me.
That’s not true.
They do. I hear them
every game.
They’re just saying that
to get you upset.
It doesn’t mean anything.
Thanks, kid.
Maybe you’re right.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Drouin, open
your fucking eyes!
(ORGAN PLAYING)
Tough news, Barclay.
Sorry.
What fucking news?
Minnesota dropped ya.
It’s in Hockey News.
I’ll save it for ya.
I got a contract!
C’mon, let’s go! Let’s go!
You know what your problem is?
You’re too fucking old
to play this game.
Take that sentence back!
(ALL CHEERING)
Too much too soon.
Guys, hold it! Hold it!
That’s it. Hold it!
Let’s go!
Dave, hold it steady.
You’re making me miss.
You got him, Dave!
That’s crap. Did you hear
what he said? He shouldn’t
have said what he said.
You don’t say stuff like that
when you’re on the ice.
Let’s win the frigging game.
We are winning
the frigging game!
You goon!
You wanna say some more?
Yeah, yeah!
You ugly bastard.
(ALL CHEERING)
Yeah! Yeah! Get him!
We were there. We saw it
with our own eyes!
Dave. Damn lard-ass.
Barclay Donaldson
jumped us.
Sure did.
Gloves off,
stick down, no warning.
He challenged the Chiefs!
JACK: Called us names!
He called us names!
But Dave was there.
Dave’s a killer!
Dave’s a mess.
Okay, but Dave’s out.
Who’s gonna take his place?
Is the answer Jesus?
Okay, guys, show us
what you got.
(SHOUTING)
(CROWD CHEERING)
God save us.
Kill the bastard!
(GROANS)
I do not believe
my frigging eyes.
(BLOWS WHISTLE)
These guys
are a fucking disgrace.
(CROWD CHEERING)
I’m telling you,
Broom County is visibly upset
by this display.
Come on down. Bring the kids!
We got entertainment
for the whole family.
There goes Jeff Hanson
into the corner. I think
it’s Jeff. No, it’s Jack.
It’s 17.
I’ll check that later.
He puts a crushing check
on him on the boards.
Things are really going on
out there now.
Steve is in front of the net.
I think that’s Steve.
Yeah, it is Steve.
I think that was Jack.
Well, it was Jeff or Jack.
These brothers
are stomping all over the…
Hold it!
You, out!
What?
You, out!
What for?
You, out!
No, no!
We’re fucking robbed!
Get your eyes examined,
you idiot!
What were you doing anyway?
They’re all gone!
No, no. It’s self-defense,
for Chrissake.
How much do you
expect a man to take?
Don’t come near me!
What are you running here?
A goddamn dance floor?
(CROWD CHEERING)
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Open it.
Son?
Joe, who own the Chiefs?
Owns! Owns!
(IMITATING JOE) Owns! Owns!
I don’t know.
Thanks.
Okay.
What?
He don’t know.
How’d you ask him?
I say, “Who own the Chiefs?”
What’d he say?
For Chrissake!
Owns! Owns!
I don’t care who own
the Chiefs. I hate it here.
Make me sick, my allergy.
Puke every time.
Like that. Puke!
You’re a goalie.
You’re supposed
to be like that.
Somebody own the Chiefs.
We go to Florida,
and I get the money!
(MUSIC PLAYING)
That’s nice.
I don’t like the way
they cover their jugs all up
with the feathers.
They are so beautiful.
They oughta cut the costume
a little higher in the thigh
so you can see more ass.
You make me sick
when you speak, Morris.
This isn’t art.
This is sex!
(CROWD EXCLAIMING)
Ogilthorpe fucked her,
you know.
Yeah, it’s true! I heard it
from a couple of guys.
Ogilthorpe
fucked the last girl
on the pinwheel
of the Ice Stravaganza.
That’s her there.
Jesus Christ.
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
Get your butt in gear,
for the love of Mike!
MAN: Slow down the main line.
Going too fast.
(ALL CHEERING)
You gals like
skating, huh?
Sure.
I mean, dressed as bluebirds
with all them feathers on,
racing around the ice!
You should talk.
Well, I just asked
outta curiosity.
I like to see
how the other half lives.
Renee, I like to skate too,
but the “hair” is rotten here.
Hair?
Yeah, the hair.
Air!
It make me sick.
Your face is a mess.
I got cut in a fight, see.
It looks sort of cute.
Are you a fighter?
Nah, I’m a lover.
Is your team any good?
No. In fact we’re so bad
that we’re disbanding.
What about Florida,
eh, Reg?
We gotta win.
We won three games
in a row.
Yeah, we’re on a roll!
We’re gonna win.
How’s Oggie Ogilthorpe?
Who?
Oggie Ogilthorpe.
You know old Oggie.
Oggie.
AHERN: Think he’s all
he’s cracked up to be?
Is he a nice guy?
I’ll be right back.
Reg,
you’re really doing great!
You got them going!
Yeah, you betcha!
HANSONS: Hey, coach!
How ya doing there?
(CHATTERING)
Son of a bitch!
(MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)
Where the hell
did all this beer come from?
From the owner.
The owner?
Yeah.
How’s his family, Reg?
He told me to tell you
he’s really glad
that we’re winning.
It’s gonna make it easier
to close that Florida deal.
You find the guy’s name?
REGGIE: Oh, yeah.
He’s a neat guy.
Looking to get us bonuses.
That’s good news, eh?
DENIS: Yeah!
(DENIS SPEAKING FRENCH)
What?
Beats me.
(ALL CHEERING)
What the fuck is that?
Hey!
Where? Oh, yeah!
(ALL CHEERING)
Hey, I think
you’re wonderful!
We thought it’d be
a big surprise.
It’s wonderful!
You look like my mother!
You’re beautiful!
WOMAN: Yea, Billy!
(GUITAR PLAYING)
Hey, Eddie! It’s me, Reg.
How are you?
(ALL SINGING)
Oh, Jesus,
we’re kicking the shit
out of everybody.
We’re unbeatable!
Listen, I got a favor
to ask ya.
Yeah. Remember Francine?
All together in one room!
Why not?
My ex-wife.
Yeah, the pretty one.
Has she been in there?
Four to a room!
We’re the Chiefs!
It’s against our policy.
Bullshit!
A couple tickets in it
for ya. Which bar?
(ALL CLAMORING)
Wait a minute. Hold it.
Everybody’s gone bananas
in here.
(WOMAN SHRIEKING)
They convicted Ogilthorpe.
CLERK: Help me.
Get the manager.
Somebody, help me.
Eddie, listen,
this guy she was with,
what’d he look like?
It’s their rink,
it’s their ice
and it’s their fucking town.
(ALL CHEERING)
But tonight we got
our fans with us!
They spent
their own dough to get here,
and they came here to see us!
All right, let’s show them
what we got, guys!
Get out there on the ice
and let them know
you’re there.
Get that fucking stick
in their side. Let them know
you’re there!
Get that lumber in his teeth.
Let them know you’re there!
Bleed all over them.
Let them know you’re there.
REGGIE: Give them
a good warm-up, Denis.
Come on, fellas!
(ALL CHATTERING)
Good game tonight, guys.
Let’s go.
(ORGAN PLAYING)
(CROWD CHEERING)
The Peterboro Patriots
versus the Charlestown Chiefs.
Brought to you by
Sheehan’s Rustproofing.
The Chiefs have
just come out on the ice
for a warm-up period.
They’re about to try
for their fifth
consecutive win.
They’re getting a good round
of applause from their own
booster club
who have traveled from
Charlestown to be here
in Peterboro tonight.
(SCREAMS)
P.A. ANNOUNCER: There’s no one
to stop it because there are
no officials on the ice.
What has come over
the Charlestown Chiefs?
(CROWD BOOING)
(WHISTLE BLOWING)
WOMAN: (SINGING)
And the rockets’ red glare
The bombs bursting in air
Gave proof through the night
That our flag was still there
Got my eye
on the three of you.
You pull one thing,
you’re outta this game.
I run a clean game here.
I have any trouble,
I’ll suspend ya!
I’m listening
to the fucking song!
Yet wave
Over the land of the free
No, no, no.
(METALLIC CLANKING)
To Mrs. Reggie Dunlop
from Reggie Dunlop.
Collect.
Well, make it station to…
Operator, I’ll pay
for the call here.
(ALL CLAMORING)
Hey, Walt!
What are you doing?
Making it look mean!
(ALL CHEERING)
MAN: Atta boy, Walt.
(PHONE DINGING)
Honey? We won last night!
Yeah, we won. I got a good
winning streak go…
Who is this?
(PHONE GOES DEAD)
Hello?
Shit!
Met a little girl
Her name was June
A little bit south
of Saskatoon
Me and Junie Mae
we got on fine
Till I had to move on
down the line
Gin.
Eight.
Hey, Reg?
Yeah?
I think I’m gonna
change my name.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah. “Killer.”
That’s got
a nice ring to it.
Yeah.
I’m not gonna do it.
I’m not gonna goon it up
for ya.
No?
Nope.
I’ll bench ya.
I’ll take my chances.
(MUSIC CONTINUES ON RADIO)
(GIRLS CHEERING)
Pick up the boosters!
Pull over, Walt.
Let the girls in here with us.
Come on, Walt, pull over.
Great.
(ALL CHEERING)
WOMAN: My husband’ll kill me
if he finds out.
Their bus
is coming up the street!
They’re coming!
(ALL SHOUTING)
WOMAN: We don’t
need you here!
MAN: There’s no room in sports
for people like you!
Get outta town!
(ALL SHOUTING)
P.A. ANNOUNCER:
We’re at seven, one.
There’s the face-off.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Charlestown Chiefs seem to be
coming down ice with the puck!
Kill those Hanson creeps!
You goons can’t skate!
We like to see
an old-fashioned brand
of hockey played here.
You’re a bunch of animals,
you Hanson apes!
(BUZZER BUZZING)
Come on!
Get outta town, four-eyes!
(CROWD BOOING)
(GLASS SHATTERING)
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
Is this the guy?
Yeah, that’s him!
No, he’s over there!
Look at that!
You can’t see. I’m on radio.
(CROWD CLAMORING)
No, not him! That’s the one!
Go fuck a moose, Froggy!
Think we should
get into this?
Just a thought.
It wasn’t me!
No, Jeff,
it’s the other guy!
Do you think
the old folks in Florida
are gonna like these guys?
I don’t believe a word
of that Florida shit.
Fans are standing up to them.
Security guards
are standing up to them.
The peanut vendors
are standing up to them!
And, by God,
if I could get down there,
I’d be standing up to them!
(ALL CHATTERING)
What hit ya?
An object
right in the face!
I know, but what was it?
I don’t know.
Key chain. You know,
car keys, house keys.
Keys to the camper?
(POUNDING ON DOOR)
Hi, guys.
The Hansons.
Hey, guys?
Put the fucking bus in gear.
The cops have come
for the Hansons.
ALL: The cops?
(BANGING ON DOOR)
How many are out there?
The Hansons.
I throw up my hands.
I can’t control them anymore.
They gotta be punished.
Will you do me a favor
and put them behind bars?
They’re looking for you guys.
There’s gotta be
some misunderstanding.
Tell them to come
and get us.
They don’t wanna risk it.
Look at his lip.
Somebody threw
a fucking tire chain.
Hit him in the mouth!
Scratches, made
by human fingernails!
This kid has taken
a savage beating.
Fellas, there are six of them
out there for us!
They’re gonna put you
in the same jail
with Ogilthorpe.
Come on, you guys.
They’ll let you make
one phone call.
They book you
and then give you a dime,
and they let you make
one phone call.
Call the pizza man!
Why don’t you call
a massage parlor?
(ALL CHATTERING)
Guys, we’ll see you later.
Bye.
Save me
a piece of pizza.
Don’t eat
my watermelon sticks.
They’re all mine.
Don’t admit to nothing,
you guys!
Dickie, it’s me, Reg.
They’re putting
the Hansons away
on a trumped-up charge.
Someone threw a monkey wrench.
Hit Jeff in the face.
No, they were defending
the honor of Charlestown
at the time.
The boosters are behind us
a hundred percent.
Dickie, have you
seen Francine?
Sergeant, you will never meet
a greater champion
of the pure sport of hockey
than me.
Sergeant, I knew Eddie Shore
and Toe Blake…
You guys back there?
Peterboro lost tonight,
so as of right now
we’re in the play-offs!
(ALL CLAMORING)
I would like to see the bail
just a little more reasonable.
Joe, hurry it up.
I wanna go home.
Sergeant, when is the trial?
You can’t leave
those guys in there.
They’re folk heroes!
They’re criminals.
Most folk heroes
started out as criminals.
You’re asking
an exorbitant sum.
Joe, I got it here.
How much these goons
gonna cost?
$250 for each.
This young fella
is in a hurry
because he’s got
the prettiest wife
waiting at home.
But she ain’t happy.
Sam, let them out.
I want a receipt.
Hey, hey, there!
Hey, coach.
We got to keep our bracelets!
Thanks a lot, Sarge.
(ALL CHATTERING)
Let’s get on the bus.
Look at that.
The boys and I
want you to have this
as a little memento.
It’s a Chiefs’ key ring.
You can’t buy these in stores.
(PLAYERS CHEERING)
Guys, we’ll party in there!
(SLOW MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
WOMAN: Aren’t those Hansons
something?
They’re sort of
funny looking.
Real funny looking.
They’re probably
real good guys.
Underneath.
They couldn’t be
as dumb as they look.
Yes, they could.
They’re just goons.
Johnny doesn’t care
for the fighting.
He told me so.
That’s bullshit.
(STATIC ON RADIO)
(CHANGING RADIO STATIONS)
If we weren’t so far
below sea level,
the radio reception here
would be much better.
I’m getting tipsy!
I’ve been shitfaced
for the past week.
I only drink
in the afternoon.
Or before a game…
or when Johnny’s away.
WOMAN: Me too.
If I’m not tight,
I can’t stand it.
That’s terrible!
It’s sad, so sad
So sad
It’s a sad, sad situation
And it’s gettin’
more and more absurd
It’s sad, so sad
So sad
Why can’t we talk it over?
Oh, it seems to me
That sorry seems
to be the hardest word
(ALL CHATTERING)
How ya doing, Lil?
Hey, Johnny.
Hey… Lil? Lil!
(HORN HONKING)
Hiya! Let’s go someplace.
Ya know the Aces?
Bully!
Can the heavy stuff.
Let’s start something.
Get the fuck out,
I’m going home!
Oh, yeah?
Where’s Braden going?
I got a better idea.
Let’s die in bed.
You’re nuts.
Jesus.
You really married a weirdo.
He don’t run with the traffic.
Speaking of weirdos!
Me? I’m normal.
Yeah? Well,
then normal is fucked.
How come you talk dirty?
‘Cause my family has money.
Leave him.
My wife left me.
I was driving her crazy!
All she could do
was drink and cry like you.
Every time she sees me,
it drives me nuts
’cause I know
she’s asking herself,
“How’d I get mixed up
with a bum like him?”
Good question!
Oh, yeah?
Next year you’ll be
asking yourself
the same question
about Braden!
He treats you like shit.
He told me the only reason
you paid attention to me
was to make him crazy
so he’d fight.
Yeah! That’s part of it.
But mainly it’s because
I think you’re a champ.
Only you gotta stop
killing yourself.
My place.
That’s a coincidence.
Get out!
Hey, you gotta
roll with it, kid.
Use your imagination.
That’s what I’ve been doing.
I can get ya straight.
(CRYING) Beat it.
Well, I’ll see you later.
Hi, guys. I’m proud of ya.
They’re talking about you
in the streets!
Coach, you want
a white avenger?
Nah. Gimme a cup of coffee.
That was a nice tribute
to the guys, Dickie.
I tried to capture
the spirit of the thing.
Yeah.
Hey, guys.
This is Dickie Dunn.
He wrote the article on ya.
Hi, guys. Nice to meet ya.
I was trying to capture
the spirit of the thing.
Hi, guys.
Hi, guys.
Hi, coach.
Hey, come out
and see the game tonight.
Compliments of the Chiefs.
Thanks, Reggie.
You too.
MAN: Free tickets!
Sure, spread them
around, guys.
Compliments of the Chiefs.
Thanks, Reggie.
You really taught that guy
a lesson last night.
He was sensational!
I guess that was a big fight.
Are you in pain?
No, it hurt like hell!
Oh, you poor thing.
WOMAN: Look, I’ll make you
a double dose of this stuff
and you won’t feel anything.
Good.
What happened to you?
He got that in the fight
last night.
That is a very deep cut.
DENIS: Will you be
at the game?
If I see you in the stands,
it make me feel better…
a little.
(CAR HORN HONKING)
Hey, Killer!
Get them tonight!
(SIGHING)
Fucking wearing me out.
Reggie!
Hiya, honey! How are ya?
You look
a thousand years old.
It was a long bus ride.
Did you listen
to the game last night?
Of course not.
We got a whole new attitude.
It’s bringing us success!
Any fool can fight.
No, I swear to ya.
The Chiefs are gonna be
sitting pretty in Florida
when this town’s
a stinking memory.
I’ve personally been talking
to the owner,
which is why I’ve been
too busy to call you.
Every waking hour,
I’m on the phone
making deals…
Reggie, I’m moving.
What?
To Long Island.
A gal who works
in a shop there
has a space open.
Business here is just dead.
Are you really going?
You know,
we have to get divorced
one of these days.
I mean, I could meet somebody.
You could meet somebody.
Yeah?
Well, don’t look so sad.
(CAR HORN HONKING)
(ALL CHEERING)
It’s gonna be a big one!
See those guys…
Reggie, look, I’m late.
I’ll write you
when I get settled.
Hey, I’ll try to call you
before you go.
It sucks!
No, son, it looks nice
and it sells hockey.
It ain’t mean enough.
Put some blood in there.
Show somebody getting hurt.
A groin injury!
Put the map of Florida
in the background.
Get some tits in there.
Put a “for sale” sign
on the bottom.
I don’t want any tits
and I don’t want
any “for sale” sign.
Jesus.
Remember that great
Peterboro game in ’68?
Yeah. What about it?
Jacky St. Pierre’s wife
left him.
It was snowing like hell
before we even
got to the motel.
Yeah.
Jacky had a whole keg sent in.
Poor Jacky. He had a future.
I told him to watch
that drunk driving!
My God, Joe,
did we ever get shitfaced!
And Jacky was running around
telling everybody
he was gonna get Jill back
even if he had to beg her.
I told him not to do that.
Oh, I think he should’ve.
She was a dynamite broad.
God did we get shitfaced.
I liked Jacky.
Yeah, he could’ve
been great.
Yeah.
Remember I went
to your room afterwards
and you were dressed
in chick’s clothes?
Yeah, you had
on this black bra
with tassels.
You were dancing
in front of a mirror with this
zebra-skinned jock strap.
Remember how I screamed at you
when you started
coming on to me?
I said, “Jesus, stop it.
I’m ashamed of ya.”
Damn you.
I wanted to tell you
I forgot the whole thing.
Years have passed now.
I’m sexually liberated.
I don’t care
who’s a fag no more.
I mean, who cares?
It’s natural.
It’s all around us!
Who’s the owner, Joe?
UPTON: He’s probably
calling Florida.
See how the sale is going.
I was in Florida once
on a southern tour
where I met
this little redhead
who’s an underwater
specialist.
(PHONE RINGING)
MORRIS: And the first thing
she says to me was,
“Come on out by the pool.”
So I went out,
and she comes leaping out
of this cabana,
wearing nothing
but this little
see-through wet suit.
Reg, I want a chair
by the pool!
I want some snatch
by the pool.
Reg, you want a coke?
No, I can’t.
I’m taping an interview
at the station.
They’re playing it
at 4:00. Don’t miss it.
That was some road trip.
Six straight wins
and a whole new rash
of penalty minutes.
We got
a whole new attitude.
What about
the Hanson brothers?
What about ’em?
They’re not just bullies?
What do you mean,
“just bullies”?
They scare the bejesus
outta everybody.
Deliberately?
I’d like the folks
to come down
and watch us cream them punks
from Syracuse.
Anything new on the sale
of the Chiefs?
I think the negotiations are,
you know, going pretty good.
I have
a personal announcement.
I’m placing a personal bounty
on the head of Tim McCracken.
He’s the coach and chief punk
on that Syracuse team.
A bounty?
Yeah.
A hundred bucks
of my own money
for the first of my men
that nails that creep.
That’s 8:00
at the War Memorial.
The Syracuse and the all-new
Charlestown Chiefs.
Thanks, Reg.
Not to worry, kid.
REGGIE ON RADIO:
I’m placing a personal bounty
on the head of Tim McCracken.
He’s the coach and chief punk
on that Syracuse team.
CARR: A bounty?
Yeah.
A hundred bucks
of my own money
for the first of my men
that really nails…
(SIGHS)
(PHONE RINGING)
Yeah?
Are you nuts?
Bullshit.
A bounty?
We could all end
in the clinker for this!
Big deal, Joe.
You can’t put a bounty
on a man’s head!
I just did.
(PHONE RINGING)
Yeah?
Reg, it’s Killer.
Oh, hi, Killer.
I want that $100.
Well, you gotta
earn it, Killer.
My attitude’s right.
Okay, kid.
(SIGHS)
(POUNDING ON DOOR)
In-fucking-credible!
Who is it?
Yeah?
(POUNDING CONTINUES)
Hi!
Oh, hi.
What’s up? Oh, Jesus.
Come on in.
Well, I did it.
You bet you did.
You did, you bet.
The wedding presents
my side gave.
Fifty-fifty, right?
Can you get my clothes?
Yeah, sure.
Jesus, did you
write him a note?
Oh, do you think
I should’ve?
I don’t know.
He’s gonna think
the worst.
Hey, Lily, we’re gonna
have a ball!
We are?
Except right now
I gotta take a nap.
I put a bounty
on this guy’s head.
If I don’t get some shut…
If I don’t get some shut-eye,
I’m gonna get murdered
out there on the ice.
Otherwise, you know,
I would’ve given you
a night on the town.
We could’ve gone
to the Aces.
She won’t mind.
She’s great to sleep with.
Ned sleeps with her
before every game.
Her breathing makes him
feel more secure.
Reg, I’m gonna get
a grip on myself,
start using my imagination,
go with the traffic.
I’ve been
going about this all wrong!
I probably am terrific.
You want some spaghetti?
Reg?
(CROWD CLAMORING)
Run the siren.
What?
Run the goddamn siren.
I’m paying for it.
Let ’em know
there’s gonna be blood
in there.
I can circle, but it’s gonna
cost you more.
For Chrissake!
There.
(SIREN WAILING)
(ORGAN PLAYING LADY OF SPAIN)
(SIGHS)
Don’t ever play
Lady of Spain again!
Jesus Christ.
Hey, McCracken!
Dunlop, you suck cock.
All I can get.
(ALL CLAMORING)
One hundred dollar bounty
on the head
of famed Syracuse stickman,
Tim McCracken.
McCracken, also known
as Dr. Hook for his scalp-like
prowess with the stick,
has been known to carve
a man’s eye out
with the flick of the wrist.
There’s a carnival-like
atmosphere here tonight.
The crowd has gathered.
You can feel it.
There’s an air of expectancy.
(CROWD SHOUTING)
Syracuse skating out now.
We’re looking forward
to a real contest tonight.
We’ll be ready to face off
at the middle circle.
The referee is ready to go.
The linesmen for tonight…
(CHANTING)
Go, Chiefs, go!
Go, Chiefs, go!
(CROWD CHEERING)
A hundred bucks says
you’re gonna
crack my skull, huh?
I wouldn’t crack your knuckles
for a hundred bucks.
So he’s bluffing?
Somebody’s gonna kill you,
you dumb son of a bitch.
But it’s not gonna be me.
(BUZZER BUZZES)
(EXCLAIMING)
Good pass!
FAN: Come on, Ned, hit him!
What’s the matter with you?
You’re a Chief!
Come on!
(CROWD SHOUTING)
You son of a bitch!
Get over here!
You chicken-shit,
yellow-belly…
I just scored a goal!
They don’t want you
to score goals.
They want blood.
They’re booing you.
Go get ’em, Killer!
Come on, you son of a bitch!
Come on!
Come on, Killer.
We win
’cause I score goals.
Kiss my ass! We win
’cause I make ’em crazy!
(CROWD CLAMORING)
Come on, nail him!
You don’t make me crazy.
I will,
’cause you’re benched!
You want ice time,
tell me when you want
to play it my way.
You’re the biggest pussy
in the league.
That’s right! I like pussy!
Yeah? That’s not what I hear
from your wife. I hear…
Go get him, Killer!
(CROWD CHEERING)
Real old-fashioned guts
for Dave “Killer” Carlson
to jump into that fight
with Tim “Dr. Hook” McCracken.
Ned Braden’s come
into the booth.
P.A. ANNOUNCER:
I noticed a discussion
with Reg Dunlop.
Have you been benched?
Yes, a first
in my professional career.
Why is that?
I won’t fight.
You could play if you fought.
Let’s just say
I’m chicken-shit.
Ned, tell me.
Why would someone
with your family background
and education
still be playing hockey?
I hate my father.
I’m also having
a lot of problems at home.
You are?
I just said
I was, didn’t I?
They’re sexual problems.
I’m perverse.
I come here to get away
from my wife!
Holy shit!
This is Jim Carr…
We fight day and night.
She wants me to quit hockey.
You may have noticed,
she’s the only good-looking
piece of ass in Charlestown.
She also has
a drinking problem.
At this moment,
I have no idea where she is.
Gimme that goddamn mike!
Why do you wear that rug?
It’s sensationally ugly!
You’re going bald!
Can’t you face up to that?
At least I’m not
chicken-shit like you!
What you’re hearing
is the truth.
Jim Carr got angry!
Joe McGrath here.
The boys like to horse around.
Chicken-shit bastard.
Sawed-off old fart!
I may be bald,
but I’m not chicken-shit.
I wanna talk about violence.
Chick, chick, chick!
Gimme that!
Son! Son! Son!
(A LITTLE BIT SOUTH
OF SASKATOON
PLAYING ON CAR RADIO)
(CAR HORN HONKING)
Hey, Billy!
Well, you’re gonna
be set, Lily.
Taking your destiny
by the throat.
You’re in the driver’s seat.
You’re not having
second thoughts about this,
are you?
Sometimes I think I get it,
and sometimes I think
it’s horseshit!
To doubt is human.
You stick with Reg.
I’m on a roll.
Bye, Francine.
Come back and see us.
I will. Thank you.
You’re gonna need
another 10 or 15 minutes.
Hiya!
Hi.
This is Lily Braden,
Ned Braden’s wife.
Actually,
she’s on waivers.
She’s in the market
for a perm.
I said, “There’s no one
better than ol’ Francine.”
Well, I don’t think…
The works! I’m buying.
I’ll pay you back tomorrow.
No, that’s not the problem.
See, the problem is…
I never laid a hand on her.
She’s just a kid.
It’s a pathetic story.
It’s pathetic.
You look terrific.
Be careful, girls.
There’s TV Radio Mirror
or Modern Screen.
You were married to him?
For about a hundred years,
but it’s all over.
He’s completely
off his rocker.
I left my husband, too.
Really?
I’m only halfway out
the revolving door.
You know what I mean?
Oh, it’s lousy at first.
You think you’re dying,
but then it’s fabulous!
You become a new woman!
Yeah.
Reggie told me
you’d gotten terrific
since you left him.
He said that?
Well, you know
what you have to do
for yourself?
You have to get out there
and circulate.
You can’t sink into it.
You have to get out there
on the firing line.
Oh, my God!
No, no, no. Really.
It’s not bad.
Look. If you did
your cheekbones better,
you could look like Cher.
(DOG BARKING)
Take this in the house.
Can you handle it?
REGGIE: Hello there.
I’m Reggie Dunlop
of the Chiefs.
I came to see your husband.
Yes? I’m Anita McCambridge.
How do you do?
Think you can help
with these?
Yeah.
Mom, I’m late.
I gotta go.
Michael, you’re gonna stay
in the yard,
put your jacket on,
and carry one of these in.
Where’s your husband?
He’s in puppy heaven.
I own the Chiefs.
This way.
What can I get you
to drink?
Canadian Club and water.
Nice place
you’ve got here.
Thanks.
To tell the truth,
Mrs. McCambridge…
Anita.
Yeah, Anita.
You know, we all read
about the possibility
of a sale…in Florida.
And the guys are getting
anxious to find out
what’s going on.
I guess
I’m their representative.
We’ve been doing real good.
My accountant
is certainly pleased.
Oh. How is the sale going?
Fine.
Oh. Good.
You think you’re gonna
like Florida?
Yeah.
Oh, you are very clever.
What?
It’s been so much fun
waiting to see
what you’re gonna do next.
The articles in the paper
are very funny.
That sportswriter?
Dickie Dunn?
Dickie Dunn.
You’ve certainly
got his number.
The radio interviews
are fantastic.
And the Hanson brothers?
Oh, my God!
Well, attendance
has quadrupled.
Yes. I am in the black
for the first time
in four years.
That’s great.
I guess I owe that to you.
Thank you.
You’re welcome.
So you can sell us
real easy then, huh?
I could probably
get some interest, yes.
Oh, boy!
That’s great!
That’s just great, Anita!
You know, for five months
I’ve been trying
to prove to you,
without ever really knowing
who you were,
that you were wrong
and we could get somebody
interested in the Chiefs.
We could sew that thing
up tonight, you know.
We oughta cream those guys.
That’s terrific.
But you have to understand
that I couldn’t make
enough of a profit
to have a sale
be worthwhile.
My accountant tells me
I’m better off folding
the team, taking a tax loss.
You mean you could sell us,
but you won’t?
I could probably sell you,
but I can’t.
Well…
You know…
We’re human beings, you know.
I have to confess
I’ve never let the children
watch a hockey game.
I have a theory
that children imitate
what they see on a TV screen.
If they see violence,
they’ll become violent.
If they see
someone stick up a bank,
they’ll stick up a bank.
Heroin. You name it.
You’re fucked!
What?
You are totally fucked!
You’re garbage
for letting us go
down the drain.
Are you serious?
You could sell us. We’re hot.
People go nuts for us.
You could find a buyer.
I don’t think
you understand finance.
You know, your son
looks like a fag to me.
You better get married again,
’cause he’s gonna wind up
with somebody’s cock
in his mouth
before you can say
Jack Robinson.
How dare you!
How dare you!
Our listeners
will be surprised to learn
that you’re
a very soft-spoken
young man, Killer.
Yes, I am.
I was watching kids
play hockey the other day.
Five and six-year-olds,
little mites. One said,
“I’m Killer Carlson.”
He picked up his little stick
and creamed that other kid.
How do you feel about that?
The way I see it,
the kid probably would’ve
done it anyway.
A bad upbringing
in the home or whatever.
That’s interesting, Dave.
Could I be serious
for a minute?
By all means.
DAVE: I’d like to say that
no matter how the game
turns out tonight,
I owe all that I am
to our coach, Reg Dunlop.
He’s had the greatest
influence on me,
aside, of course,
from the Swami Baha,
whose
positive thinking records
have been a tremendous help.
Positive thinking records?
Yeah, that’s right.
You can get them
at any religious record store.
I know
that thousands of people
in Charlestown have lost jobs
with the mill closing
and all.
I see ’em walking around
the streets depressed
all the time.
I want to say to all you
unemployed folks,
you can get a whole new
lease on life
with these records,
nothing will bother you
anymore.
You can just go out
and clobber the next guy
in your business life.
That’s very
inspirational, Dave.
Thanks.
Take care of yourself.
Jesus Christ,
what a fucking nightmare.
Braden!
Ned!
Hey!
Kid.
Hey, come on back!
You don’t have to fight.
You can do whatever
you want. It’s up to you!
You know, I’ve had it
with this show business
crap too.
I don’t know what hit me.
I’m driving up
and I say to myself,
“Who cares about Florida?
“Screw the sale. It’s probably
a bunch of crap anyway.”
No, that’s bullshit.
Hey!
The team’s history, kid.
There ain’t no next year.
I’m tits up after this game,
no matter what happens.
But I’ll tell you one thing.
We’re gonna win
that fucking championship
tonight.
But we’re gonna win it
fair and square.
Old-time hockey.
None of this wrestling shit.
You know, what the hell?
It’s my last game.
I’m gonna go out with style.
Play it straight.
I’d like to have you
there with me.
Oh, you know,
Lily’s been staying
at my place.
She’s a terrific gal.
We’ve been having
a hell of a time.
(SIREN WAILING)
MAN: Hey, Reg!
Yeah, what do you want?
Want me to circle,
run in with stretchers?
Get out of here,
you goddamn parasite!
CROWD: Get ’em, baby!
Get ’em!
This is Jim Carr.
Jeff Hanson,
I can’t tell you
what you’ve done
for all of us,
the pleasure you’ve given us.
I’d like to ask you
one question.
Win, lose or draw,
this is the Chiefs’ last game
before you leave
Charlestown…
We’re gonna
kill ’em tonight.
JEFF: What do you mean,
Flood City?
CARR: Never mind, Jeff.
I guess that’s before
your time.
Hey, Reg Dunlop.
How about a statement?
Good game, fella.
Good luck tonight.
Get outta here.
CARR: Reg Dunlop
has asked us
to come back…
Come on, girls!
Get out of here!
Come on.
No hit.
The Chiefs are history, guys.
There ain’t no Florida deal.
Come on, Reg.
What are you talking about?
I just made that shit up.
We’re deader
than this stinking town.
Hey! Dead history!
I conned you guys.
I just lied to you.
We were never anything
but a rich broad’s
tax write-off.
It’s never made
a fuck’s bit of difference
whether we won or lost.
Nail ’em!
Kill ’em!
(HANSONS CLAMORING)
We ain’t been hockey players.
We’ve been clowns.
We’ve been goons!
We’ve been freaks
in a fucking sideshow.
We’re a bunch of criminals.
We oughta be in jail.
That’s all there is to it.
I’m ashamed.
Not you, coach.
Yeah. I’m really
ashamed of myself.
See, Ned was right.
Violence
is killing this sport.
It’s dragging it
through the mud.
If things keep up
the way they are,
hockey players will be nothing
but actors, punks.
I’m not playing
my last game that way.
Last game?
Yeah.
It’s my last game,
and I wanna play it straight.
No more “nail ’em!”
No more “fuck with ’em!”
That’s finished.
I want to win
that championship tonight,
but I wanna win it clean.
Old-time hockey,
like when I got started.
You know?
Toe Blake,
Dit Clapper, Eddie Shore.
Those guys were the greats.
I don’t know what to say.
It’s up to you.
Reg is our coach.
Sure, old-time hockey.
Like Eddie Shore.
JEFF: Yeah!
Coach, our line starts?
Sure.
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
We got a game to win.
BRADEN:
This is the big one, guys!
(ORGAN PLAYING)
Evening, boys.
Wimpy, how are ya?
Crash, how are you?
Scotty.
Better than Philadelphia
this time.
You’re gonna get an eyeball
of the new Charlestown Chiefs.
Ladies and gentlemen,
this has all the earmarks
of a hockey classic.
The championship confrontation
between the Syracuse Bulldogs
and the…
Here they come now!
The rags-to-riches
Cinderella contenders
of the Federal League,
the Charlestown Chiefs!
(CROWD CHEERING)
(CROWD CHANTING)
Let’s go, Chiefs!
Let’s go, Chiefs!
Let’s go, Chiefs!
Let’s go, Chiefs!
Let’s go, Chiefs!
Let’s go, Chiefs!
Ladies and gentlemen,
I can’t explain this delay.
I don’t know why Syracuse
has elected to miss
the warm-up.
The Chiefs have already skated
over to their bench.
It might be Syracuse
is afraid to come out
and face the Chiefs.
Oh, thanks, Bill.
Good heavens!
I’ve just been handed
the Syracuse roster,
and it appears
the Syracuse Bulldog
management
is real thirsty
for a big grudge-match
type victory here tonight.
They’ve brought back
for this one contest…
Here they come now,
led by someone
we all know very well,
Tim “Dr. Hook” McCracken!
(CROWD BOOING)
And here’s a name
from the past.
Ross “Mad Dog” Madison.
Ross, as you know,
never travels anywhere
without his longtime friend
and attorney,
Sam “Small Print” Lyman.
And here’s a name
for you nostalgia fans.
Clarence “Screaming Buffalo”
Swamptown!
I’ll never forget
an exclusive interview
I did with him many years ago
when Buffalo revealed
that he liked to call
his hockey stick
The Big Tomahawk.
He usually refers
to the opposing players
as The Little Scalps.
I thought he’d been
suspended forever.
Andre “Poodle” Lussier,
defense.
Andre has been living
in semi-seclusion
in northern Quebec
since the unfortunate
Denny Pratt tragedy.
Not Poodle!
And from Mile Forty,
Saskatchewan,
where he now runs
a doughnut shop, number 15,
former penalty-minute
record holder
of the Federal League
for the years
1960 to 1968 inclusive,
Gilmore Tuttle.
Gilmore Tuttle.
Oh, gee. Hold the phone.
This is
an unscheduled surprise.
It’s him!
This young man has had
a very trying rookie season
what with the litigation,
the notoriety, his subsequent
deportation to Canada
and that country’s refusal
to accept him,
that’s more than
most 21-year-olds
could handle.
Ogilthorp.
Oggie Ogilthorpe.
(THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER
PLAYING)
Hi, Oggie.
Buy you a soda
after the game!
Hi. You know
Toe Blake? No?
We’ll straighten you out,
you little prick.
How.
They don’t call me
Dr. Hook for nothing.
How ya doing?
All right, no high-sticking,
no tripping, no slashing…
Major surgery. Open heart.
I’m waiting for quiet.
Yeah, you’ll have quiet.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Give ’em hell!
(INDIAN WAR WHOOP)
Give ’em
the old-time hockey!
(CROWD BOOING)
Good crowd.
Shirley!
Teamwork! Teamwork! Teamwork!
Eddie Shore!
Come on, get up!
One with the universe.
One with the universe.
Nothing matters.
This reporter is stunned!
The Charlestown Chiefs
are not fighting back.
Keep the guys off me!
Come on!
(BUZZER BUZZING)
The Chiefs’
performance tonight has got
to be a bitter disappointment
to these 4,000
Charlestown fans
who have packed
this War Memorial,
paying good money
to witness this fiasco.
DENIS: Get Oggie!
Move away, Wanchuk.
You’re screening me!
You’re screening me!
Move away!
Give ’em some of that back!
Don’t let ’em
push you like that.
Get up!
WOMAN: Get off your ass!
I don’t know
what’s wrong!
You bums!
You’re no damn good!
Get up off your ass!
Okay, you guys.
Let’s get some speed
out there.
Cement heads.
Keep your eyes open.
Better passing.
We got a big three
coming up out there.
Try to come back
with the wingers maybe.
Tonight’s the night.
Who wants an ice pack?
Over here, Charlie.
(PLAYERS CLAMORING)
REGGIE: We need some more
coordination out there.
Keep your eyes open.
Better passing.
(SHOUTING IN FRENCH)
I’m coming!
It’s all right.
Mother of God.
REGGIE: I want a big rally
this period.
We’re losing!
REGGIE: More teamwork, guys.
They’re burying us alive!
Eddie Shore?
Piss on Eddie Shore.
Old-time hockey?
Piss on old-time hockey!
You’re blowing it! Boys!
Every scout in the NHL
is out there tonight
with contracts
in their pockets,
and they’re looking
for talent.
For winners!
All my years of publicity,
all the fashion shows
and radiothons for nothing!
They come here tonight
to scout the Chiefs!
The toughest team
in the Federal League!
Not this
bunch of…pussies!
Scouts?
(CROWD CHEERING)
This is more like it.
It makes me feel glad
to see the Chiefs
on the warpath again,
to coin a phrase.
God, it’s been a long time
since this place
saw my shadow.
What am I doing here?
You look fabulous.
Now, come on.
(CROWD CLAMORING)
God, I’d forgotten.
Everybody
is on their feet screaming,
“Kill! Kill!” This is hockey!
ALL: Kill! Kill! Kill!
(CHANTING) Let’s go, Chiefs!
All right! Kill ’em!
They’re pummeling each other.
Wait a minute. Ned Braden
is skating out on the ice.
He’s not fighting. No. He’s…
Ned Braden is starting
to take off articles
of his uniform.
(STRIP MUSIC PLAYING)
(CROWD CHEERING)
Way to go, Ned.
I don’t want
any youngsters out there
to get the idea
this is the way
to play hockey.
Stop that!
That’s disgusting.
I protest!
Protest? Protest my…
I’m certainly glad
Mrs. Carr isn’t here tonight
because this is
a lascivious display…
Take it off!
Make him stop
or we’re leaving!
Get your paws off me,
Scarface!
Stop him!
This is a serious game,
not a freak show.
What are you talking about?
This is hockey!
You’re afraid
of these goons, aren’t ya?
Watch out, punk!
Get that pervert off!
Get your hands off me
or forfeit this game!
Forfeit, my ass!
Look at that!
(CROWD EXCLAIMING)
All right, that’s it.
That’s the game.
You lose. Out! Lose?
What the hell are you
talking about?
Come on, dummy.
You won the game.
Pick up your trophy.
(PLAYERS CHEERING)
Here ya go, ya bum.
The Chiefs
have won the championship
of the Federal League!
He’s gonna
catch his death out there!
(BAND PLAYING)
I said
some bad things about the boy,
but we can explain that
to the exuberance
and excitement of youth,
because he’s certainly
changed his ways now.
My boy!
(CROWD APPLAUDING)
(BAND PLAYING YANKEE DOODLE)
Hi, Francine!
Francine!
Come on, honey.
You got all the room
in the world.
You ain’t gonna
hit anything. Come on!
I got good news.
I’m paying by the hour
for this thing.
The Minnesota Night Hawks.
I’m coaching. The Big Apple.
Somebody’s playing
a joke on you.
No! I’ve got a contract
back there in the car!
The Chiefs are history.
But the minute
I get up to Minnesota,
I’m gonna bring
my guys up there.
We’re a solid act, honey.
We’re starting out
with something big.
Oh, Jesus!
What?
You don’t have my number.
If you want to get
in touch with me,
do it through the team,
the Minnesota Night Hawks.
You’re gonna need money
or something.
Or maybe things
won’t work out
the way you expect.
Geez, we’ve got
a lot of years
between us, Francine.
Some hard miles,
you know?
I know.
(HORN HONKING)
Shut up,
you goddamn meathead!
Honey, I gotta go.
If things don’t work out,
get in touch with me
in Minneapolis.
Bye, Reggie.
I could make
a goddamn fortune.
Is she coming
to Minnesota?
Oh, for sure!
(CROWD APPLAUDING)
(CROWD CHEERING)
(RIGHT BACK WHERE
WE STARTED FROM PLAYING)
Ooh and it’s all right
And it’s comin’ along
We gotta get right back
To where we started from
Love is good
Love can be strong
We gotta get right back
To where we started from
Do you remember the day
That shiny day
When you first came my way
I said no one
could take your place
And if you get hurt
If you get hurt
By the little things I say
I can put that smile
back on your face
Ooh and it’s all right
And it’s coming on
We gotta get right back
To where we started from
Love is good
Love can be strong
We gotta get right back
To where we started from
And it’s all right
And it’s comin’ along
We gotta get right back
To where we started from
Love is good
Love can be strong
We gotta get right back
To where we started from