How to Sell Anything by Tony Robbins *rare video
so all you have to do to persuade someone is do two simple things one you have to identify and ideally that first step you’re going to do is you’re going to identify the buying state one and two is you’re going to anchor it anchor that state to your product now ideally right i wouldn’t just push it that fast right because their strategy maybe have more information but once i’ve identified that state and can set it off consistently can i get this person to attend the seminar yes or no it was absolutely about doubt it’s just like i’ve impoverive in the dogs it’s a lot of people go on they teach sales persuasion they go say this and do that and say there’s some do that and say do this hey that’s all garbage here’s what you do to be able to do this these two pieces now if you want to see it in the content shape here’s how you persuade first part of this football field called persuasion is to identify or develop what rapport you got to develop a pool you don’t walk up and go hey babies you ever feel like you have pure xc and you ever want to do that again come fill out this ticket that that won’t work real well right they’re going to go what are you you go ecstatic now i don’t know they’ll just that’ll get their attention i don’t know if it’ll have the effect you want the point is you gotta have rapport how many of you can get developed before by matching mirroring tonality breathing patterns gestures eye movements anything raise your hand aha so the first part down rapport simple you want people here to say me too me too not so what right if you go around and you say hey this is the most incredible thing that’s like when i did it it’s like i met god right in the center of the coals and like i just wanted to just like you know feel like i was going on my surfboard down this incredible wave in maui and and what are they gonna be saying so what because is that what they would do no so do you want to tell them all about your experience until you first find out what their experience would be so you need to find out what their needs are first thing i do is rapport on me too you got to be like them see then when you start to share something they’re going to go god if she really believed she really had that experience and hey i probably would have the same kind of experience here’s the problem in most persuasion a person goes out and they’re all like this hey this is really great you gotta go this thing is so fabulous right and the other person is in kinesthetic right and they can’t figure out why the guy won’t go the guy goes home maybe next time mary is that going to be are you going to be effective in your persuasion there no way because you blew it right up front you’re not putting them in the state before you put them in state when first thing you need to do is have rapport so when you’re talking that person you don’t want to be over grady and come by and kick them in the face and go god it’s such a fabulous seminar you can do anything you want in it that doesn’t work what you’ve got to be able to do is enter the world and in entering the world say you know if there’s anything at all you could have in your life right now what would that be the person goes i don’t know if you didn’t know what would it be oh god if i could just if i could just feel like you know my relationship with my wife could work you know people will tell you that kind of stuff when you have report won’t they and people discover that they’ll tell you stuff they won’t tell anybody else i was in jerry west’s office the other day i was really excited he’s my hero a basketball player so you know probably the greatest guard that ever played and i spent two hours with him and rickering was with me and we were both kind of laughing and looking each other back and forth because he kept saying god i never didn’t tell anybody this stuff but you know i mean tell us more stuff why do you do that because we are poor right we have total rapport my point is you say something like that and someone said well you know i don’t know i just wish that my self-image would change see once they tell you all those things what have you identified their needs now do you have enough information you know idea general idea about how these seminar principles like anchoring and rapport and knowing what you want and turning resistance and assistance and love strategies do you have enough information there to affect just about anything any human being wants you better believe it so all you’ve got to do is find out what that is and then find out what would it be like if that relationship totally did work well it would be fabulous i mean would it be really fabulous think oh yeah or you can give them a certain look you don’t have to make the sound right as long as you duplicate it exactly or if you’re friends right you’re sitting here would it really be fabulous if you’re sitting next to them you don’t have to reach across your slap just touch them right some people get really carried away with their anchors they think they have to go up and go you don’t have to do that to anchor somebody right all you got to do is just go what would really be it right you know they’re sitting next to you like that like that lady’s anchoring her right now and laughter right right try it try it again watch what happens see she still smiles still laughs my point very simply is this that if you ask somebody like that you can find a human’s needs what they really want and they need and they only tell you that at first you’ve got what rapport so here you’re identifying you’re getting rapport right and you’re finding out simultaneously you want to find out what it is find out what it is that they need find out if you if you had if you could change anything in your life right now and what would you change oh i like it all the way it is well if you could make anything better what would you make better well nothing oh so you’re just going to stay like you are now then forever well no i won’t be like i am from now forever well if it could be better how would it be better most people will tell you you don’t have to go through all this stuff with them they’ll go well i don’t know i really like it say well you know if something could be a little bit better what would it be i said well you know i’d like to be able to earn more money well what would it take for you to be able to earn more money in your business well i don’t know i if i could learn to persuade more and or if i could learn to you know build rapport with my boss you know see what have you identified real specific needs say let me ask you a question if you could go spend a few hours with someone who was an absolute master in that area of human communication relationships business whatever it could be if you could spend that and by the end of that time have the skill to be able to change that right away and the support to do it too would it be worth taking some time and some energy and some capital to do would it be worth it i mean to get all that you want for the rest of your life or to get with this particular thing would that be worth it so you’ve got to be able to what we call close someone right you’ve got to be able to get them to make a what decision and more importantly a commitment because see people the normal approach to human beings is they will just put things off people put things off that’s a normal approach what you got to do is get them to commit and some people when they start to do that if you if all of a sudden you change your physiology and you go so what would it be worth if you were going to do that and this and that are you going to be able to have this person be persuaded no because are you in rapport anymore biggest problem in persuasion is guys got rapport the whole time right and then they go to ask for the money and what happens well uh um i got this seminar huh would you uh uh maybe like to go is that how you do it no you’re just just congruent you’re going you got to go to this thing it’ll give you that answer and it’s well worth it here fill this thing out but i know the money put on a nice charge or a visa whatever it takes you got to go right you go but but but but you just go what do you mean bottom line is what you’ve got to do is you got to go to this thing do you want to continue to live this way with this thing happening in your life well no do you want to change it yes and you got to go here write a check don’t mount it too hard whatever it takes see congruency will do it if you have that congruency and if you fill their needs you’ll do it but you got to have rapport and you got to find out what they need the next piece here is in this persuasion pieces sometimes you got to give people a certain amount of logic and reason but notice if this was a football field 40 yards of the football field is identification rapport getting reports of the same me too not so what finding out what their needs are and having them like you personally and think you’re like them that way when you say it’s worth it will they believe you but if you’re in a different kind of person will they believe you no they’re going to go well they like it because they’re different but if you’re like them and you like it they’re going to go well they like that they’re like me ah okay so logic and reason is the second part that is notice that’s maybe 10 yards of the football field 10 yards meaning that you’re just going to give them a few details you know it’s 125 well worth every piece it’ll be at this place get a pencil write this down write down so-and-so address do you ask him do you want to go no of course you don’t want to ask him that you assume the sale if you found somebody’s needs and you feel it do you have the right to assume the sale you better believe it in fact if you don’t you’re not showing any personal power or any respect for that individual if they have a true need and you know you can fill it and you don’t then not only have you not had any value but you’ve probably taken some away because you got them to remember the things they don’t like in their life see what you want to do is get them to be clear what it is that they can improve their life and then show them how to do it right away so the bottom line is that you say here’s what it is and the way to give logic and reason is go write this down grab a pencil come on right you gotta have that kind of congruency and if you have rapport can you say write this down will people respond if you have a report oh yes if you don’t have a report it won’t work rapport is the presupposition for all this effectiveness so you say write this down it’s okay it’s on march 22nd or that’s right march 22 here’s where it is write this down it’s this location and as they’re writing it down they’re already beginning to unconsciously begin to commit to being there so you give them the logic and reason the next piece is called attack and confess attack and confess part of the persuasive process you must attack and confess that is there are a couple things that come up for human beings in any human transaction that is getting humans to do anything buy things go places do things these are basically three major objections you’ll hear in your lifetime number one i don’t have enough what time right in most cases you’re gonna hear i don’t have enough time because people don’t like to admit they don’t have what money so they go i’m busy i don’t have time right so the bottom line is that’s one the second one here is i don’t have enough money and the real reason why people don’t do things is they don’t believe it’s worth it which simply means that you haven’t tapped their strategy you haven’t put and tapping the strategy means you haven’t put them in a state where they would feel how you’d want them to feel or how they’d want to feel in order to go see if someone says i don’t believe i should go this thing i don’t think it’s worthwhile well if you did believe it was worthwhile how would you feel what would happen if you right now all of a sudden instantly you changed and instantly you started to think hey this is really worthwhile if you were to do that right now what would have changed what are you talking about just think for a second what if this thing was totally worthwhile what if this thing was worth every ounce every penny every time every amount of energy that you would invest in it and it would come back tenfold would you want to go then and they go well yeah of course what have you done just now by using that set of language patterns in order to understand you they had to process that didn’t they in order to process that it’s like saying don’t spill the milk in order not to build the milk you got to process what spilling them looks like so if you say to them what would it be like if all of a sudden instantly you change what am i also doing embedded commands i’m saying all of a sudden you changed and you believed it was worthwhile and all of a sudden you start to think about all the areas in your life would be worthwhile what would be like then what if you went to this thing and as a result your relationships are working perfectly would it be worth it then well yeah fill out the card see but you must do it while they’re in state if they’re out of state you’re not going to have it it’s like the example i gave i think last week right if you go into a place to get some food and the waiter or waitress comes by and they slam down their ticket and say here’s your menu what do you want is that person like that all the time is that the time to say to them i don’t like the service here no that’s absolutely not the time will that get your outcome at all absolutely not what you have to do in that case is realize that you need to put that person in a state if you want to get some good service and that you’re responsible because you’re a professional communicator see not only one of my staff came and said you know you blew up on me in this place and i did i blew up one time i was in the state of just and i apologized for it i said i didn’t apologize right he goes yeah he said but you know i feel like it happens a lot i said well i’m in that state sometimes you got to be ready for it i said that’s not the time to come in and ask me do you want to do this or you shouldn’t do that when i’m in a state of this is what’s going to happen see that’s not the time right you just watch my physiology or you use a phrase to change my state you go robbins you know i like this thing about it or i think this is great or you go remember that time when this happened or you changed my state you changed my physiology by doing that you’re gonna have a chance to be able to communicate it to me and i’m not gonna respond in a negative way i’ll respond in a positive way but you got that sensory acuity same thing with a waitress right you want to change your physiology change your state and you can get great service how do you change somebody’s state what are your choices quickly pattern interrupt what else metaphor you can mirror their state take them out you can change the physiology by doing anything changing physiology is the first key right or you can ask them something that makes them process differently or you can say something instead of responding what most people do you go god they must be working your tail off here you know i uh you know take your time with us will that change somebody’s state now how do they respond to you differently oh absolutely because you’ve changed their internal feeling and you change their internal feeling whole new set of behaviors so the key to sales is put them in a state where they’ve bought before and then while they’re in that state either anchor it or you know expose your product while you talk about remember that thing you absolutely love that’s what this is but if you go here’s what i love this is what you should do will that work no you’ve got to make sure it’s something they want they need some of the time when they knew it was right remember a time when you made a decision you knew was absolutely right remember a specific time no no i mean a time when you were happy about your decision yeah what if you felt that way about this right now what’s happened you just attached those you’ve at least got to start connecting and say that’s how you’re going to feel once again your congruency and your willingness to understand that no does not mean no it just means i need more information it means you have not put me in state no is a different state than yes isn’t it so all you have to do is put somebody in yes state that’s persuasion put them in the estate put them in a behavior an internal feeling where they want to say yes and then ask them to do something you want to do and they’ll respond that way i’ll answer your question a minute okay so attack and confess means you know you’re going to hear money and time right you know you’re going to hear those if someone’s if they’re going to object at all so the key here is not to allow them to happen but to take care of them up front the way the way to do that is you say you know what before i tell you more about this i want to say something i don’t know if this is something you’ve ever experienced with other people but i’ve experienced i’ve got this thing i know is valuable like like you just told me you want to make your relationships better don’t you and what am i getting from her commitment that she does want to make her labor relationship better so you want to do that piece and i know you’re committed not everybody’s committed some people tell me after i do all this stuff and i show them exactly how they can make their relationship work can you believe this some people tell me i don’t have time to go can you believe that somebody said i don’t have time to go to something that can absolutely change my relationships make it work some people operate that way can you believe that she doesn’t know i can’t believe that what what’s your chance by the way i office can you believe that somebody would somebody’s entire relationship the most important thing in their life and they go they don’t have time for it can you believe something like that somebody would do that can she ever come back and go oh by the way i don’t have time to go she could but will she no she’d have to take everything that she believes in her own self-image in every way there’s no way i said you know the one other one i hear is i don’t have enough money and you and i both know that if something is important enough some way we can borrow you know beg do whatever it takes manage something here and i’ll pay something there i mean i know i’ve done that you’ve done that before haven’t you yeah i mean the same thing has to be done here for people some people say well you know i don’t have enough money to fix my relationship so that works the way i want anyway i know that’s not you so those are those are things i was just saying about that you know i want you to think about people you know and then if money or time is an objection then what i want you to do mary is i want you to help me to get them to come with you the seminar because i know you’d like to share this with your friends because she already what she said that was important didn’t she so what you and i got to do is figure out how to make sure that they overcome these fears and stuff can you help me to do that now what have i got her to do now she’s agreeing right but what she’s going to do is help me to get other people to come to seminar with me with her which means she’s already what going okay it’s like getting a train on a track you go yes yes yes yes yes yes right if you get somebody going yes yes yes all the way through i think all of a sudden this train is going 100 miles an hour one way they’re all set at the end is going to go jump in the middle there turn around and go the other direction not very likely because you get a thing called momentum so what you have to do is continually get commitments from the individual so you set the stage by the way that you enter their world by developing this thing called rapport and finding out their needs and people love to talk about themselves and if you really are sincere which i believe all of you are here are you wouldn’t be here if you really care and you’re really sincere and you’re developing rapport and you’re like them and you’re finding their needs then you’re going to already set somebody on the yes track aren’t you because they’re going to want to agree with you because you’re like them you’re they know that you care about them if you then as you’re doing that and you begin to fill their needs by asking things you are committed to this right i say yes i am committed you’ve got to wait till they say yes you can go you’re committed to this right then just go somewhere else you have to have to set the stage right from the beginning of getting commitments from people getting rapport and getting commitments and then through the continuity of your communication meaning continuously coming back to the value and adding to that and through your own enthusiasm and through your own personal congruency and commitment the rest is just assuming the sale that’s all it takes that’s the bottom line enthusiasm by the way comes from the word en theos which means god-like right people are infected by that so you have rapport you know what they need you have logic and reason you attack and confess with enthusiasm that’s how some people are can you believe that and then what you do is this is like the hell if you don’t right which preachers have used for years which by the way is very valuable because you know what some people will do things more we’ll do things and work harder to avoid something than they will to get something it’s unfortunate but that’s the way our culture seems to be organized i mean out of what do you think most sales are organized on they’re not organized on benefit they’re organized on fear i mean if you talk to retailers association you hear those managers you figure out how they do it it’s fear of loss right that’s how it’s organized last one though is called solution solution and in the solution stage of what you’re doing what you’re going to do in solution is you’re going to show them the heaven if you do and by the way let me just say on attack and confess the way you attack is by either attacking the principal not the person right you attack some people actually do this and they just don’t understand or an even better way is to confess that you’ve been guilty you know what i had a chance to go this thing six months ago and i didn’t go until two months ago and i swear i can’t even imagine the amount of time i lost and everything else i mean i you know that’s why i’m here to share this with you because i’m not willing to let people do that anymore i know you’re going to go to this thing now because i’m going to let you you know be able to slough off like i did because i lost four months of my life see is that pretty powerful the person’s going to come back and go well much harder solution that was the final piece the heaven if you do that saying by the way by doing this here’s what’s going to happen your relationship’s going to work this is going to happen all of a sudden when you come home you’re going to know how to set an anchor with your husband so he’s absolutely in ecstasy i mean can you imagine the kind of life that you’re going to have when every time you come home and as soon as he hears your voice he goes ah right can you imagine what would be like because every time he sees your face it causes him to feel really powerful internal feelings those kinds of feelings that just that you guys had originally when you first met and that’s what that’s gonna be like that’s what’s gonna happen you’re gonna have skill to do that okay and last second here is the close and the close simply means right closing just simply means to be able to bring things together you know bring different parts together that’s what closing is doing bring the cards together to create a completion and so what you’re going to do is you’re going to say so what i want to do is fill this thing out and i’ll set it up and who else do you think would want to come see if she starts to answer who else will come then she’s already also once again what she said she’s coming so i’m giving you a bunch of crash stuff here all one time but the key here is put somebody in the state where they say yes put some in the state where they want something and you can put them in state by asking them a time in the past when they wanted something and keep attaching it to your product that’s all persuasion needs and if you’re clear in defining person’s need or outcome something that they desire and you keep pulling that in it’s pretty irresistible if you continually go forward and if you know that your congruency is that you don’t accept the word no all right because no just means that you haven’t gotten me in state yet no it means i don’t have enough information yet you haven’t taught my strategy effectively so you need to do it again as i said last week the insurance companies did a market or did a market research study and they found that the top salespeople in the united states were people the top persuaders in the united states were people who got their sales after their fifth no i mean people said no five different times before they did it and they weren’t hard closers because they had rapport right and they just reframed it redirected it until they found the way that’s what persuasion is all about throughout history that’s what persuasion’s all about john f kennedy when he talked to khrushchev about sending his missiles over right when chris just said no would he go well he said no i wish i better find somebody else to talk he didn’t do that did he right he understood that crucifix just didn’t fully understand yet the level of congruency which john f kennedy was going to provide him with on a continuous basis until finally khrushchev’s internal state his kinesthetic internal changed right and as a result so did his behavior so you need to understand that that’s all persuasion is all about and it goes much higher than creating a ticket sale it goes to your children and it goes to your boss and it goes to yourself as a persuader as a manager or anything else
